make time move slower please?

im seriously into the K wave now!
woooooooh!

the day before,
a pig reminded me of PP.
just now,
my mum reminded me of it by asking:
"you no holiday homework one meh?"
she thinks im still a primary/secondary school student.
-.-
my holidays just started,
let me enjoy for awhile pretty please~

screw you since you always screw my life!
i was happy without you.
why do you always show me that attitude especially when i didnt do anything at all?
stop being f-ing bias,
it just makes me hate you even more.
and i dont give a damn.
i wont entertain you just to suit you anymore.

SS501 is the ♥!

mummy dragged me out of bed to go shopping with her and bro.
worst thing is we went to town!
freaking crowded!
so irritating.
seriously hate crowded places.

GAP's clothes is ♥!
especially their jackets, cardigans and pullovers!
save up, save up, save up!
i prefer GAP comparing to topshop.

i finally bought my 2nd solo collection!
so happy!
saw SHINee's and FT Island's album too!
thanks to my mum's and bro's presence,
i only bought the 2nd solo collection.
i wanted to buy "U R Man" album toooooooo!
my bro was nice today.
he was the one who pointed out the SS501 albums to me.
and seriously,
"U R Man" album's packaging is nice!
even my bro said so.

guys being guys.
my bro really could not tell that my mum wanted to window shop for awhile.
dumb brother!
but we still ended up going off cus my mum only listens to my brother.
-.-

im so happy!

i think i forgot to wish someone happy birthday today.
i also dont know who.
oh well.

watched "the proposal"!
nice movie,
but the cinema theatre spoilt it all!
argh!
the male main character was HOT!
but im still loyal to my young saeng! ♥

i was so tempted to buy those mags at kinokuniya!
but they are superb ex and in chinese.
so i just gave it a miss.
kinokuniya cheats people's money!
LOL.

and i finally gotten my albums!
im left to hunt for their solo collection!
their 2nd solo collection!
wooooh!

im going out on saturday again!
weeeee!
hope i can get the 2nd solo collection at HMV or something.
or i can just go crazy!
lol.

im trying hard.

finally.
UTs are over and holidays are here!
but i really cannot put the feeling of knowing that i will fail my UT aside.
it really suck.
whenever its gone from my mind,
there will always be someone talking about it.
never fail to remind me of it.

dinner at J8 sakae was not a nice experience.
we sat at the tail of the thing.
so not much varieties left on our side.
and J8 was crowded!
so irritating.
and i was rubbing the bruise on my leg while eating.
and it became more obvious in colour.
damn ugly!
arghhh!

on a brighter note,
im finally meeting huixian tomorrow!
shopping~~~~

i want to sleep!

im so tired.
but holidays officially starts at 4pm after my paper ends!
cannot wait for it!
im just going to watch music bank and sleep after i get home!

im bored.
im tired.
so im catching a short lil break before i chiong my studies again.

1 of anycall's advertistment.
im nice to find the one with english sub.
quality not that good though, but its watchable!

i feel so depressed.

im getting the exam stress.
im feeling so down.
i cannot solve those questions.
tomorrow is UT.
best.

im trying to encourage myself.
but i really dont feel like touching the notes anymore.
not a single one.
play by ear tomorrow, shall i?
but your words made me feel like im going to disappoint you greatly.
im so sorry.
perhaps this is my very best.

in a state of panic.

i know i will regret wasting time blogging,
but i need a break.
i just feel so depressed not being able to solve that problem.
spent so much time looking at it,
but i still cant solve it.
totally wasted my time.

i cant put hopes for my notes and bottle of water to cheer me up,
cus my music is not helping either.

i hate racing against time.
i still have 1 whole module not touched.
and im not even done with stats.
best.

totally distracted.

been sitting in the same spot, same position.
sitting on the second problem of stats for... 8 hours and counting.
im totally not in the mood to study now.
i feel like sleeping instead cus im on my bed "studying".
wrong decision to totally relax yesterday.
arghhhh!
so i have to study through the night to make up for it.

anyone who could put my back into the study mood and make me concentrate would be very much appreciated!

kyujong! ♥



your words made my day very much.
thanks! ♥

seriously burnt out.

studying till damn late and waking up early.
im so damn tired.
the feeling of being very tired and in need of sleep, but just not being able to sleep sucks big time.
just too tired until cannot sleep.
but this will continue till next tuesday.

and youtube suck after their update or something.
its just so freaking laggy.
it just pisses me off.
or is it just my laptop?
cus its also freaking laggy.
and it pisses me off equally.
lol.

2 down, 2 to go.
let me just work on the 2 toughest papers.

口是心非

taking a break and letting everything out before i get back to studying.

so freaking demoralizing.
im really not expecting any improvements for my grade.
i didn't and do not have any confidence.
i questioned myself: was it because you were too tired? or was it because you are still not prepared?
i couldn't answer it.

people i saw in school on my way back home kept asking me how was it.
i replied it was fine, but it wasn't.
how else could i answer when people around said it was easier than before?

3 more papers to go.
hope it goes smoother than today's.

last day of E44C..

i wont wear all black unless needed to anymore.
it kind of affected my mood for the day.
freaking tired and not in the mood for studying.

2nd break onwards was photo time!
class photos, group photos, self portraits..
i was being dragged to take photos.
after that i stick to my chair all the way.
and people came to me to take photos instead.
but oh well,
its the last day of class afterall.

Mr JK brightened up my day on the way home.
so now im in a better mood.
and im going to study till i drop.

an acceptable monday.

it wasnt as bad as i thought i would be,
thanks to hong zhen, jeremy and neelam!
although they came to study in RP and and gave me loads of problems outside my class,
but their presence brightened my mood!
thanks for the mini pearl too! ♥

aiyer!
i cannot believe it at first,
but im being forced to face the fact.
but im being forced to accept the fact.
but i still ♥ you as always!
just let me psycho myself back to the original state,
where Heo Young Saeng is ♥!

it left me nothing but tears.

so ultimately you still dont believe in me.

18 years..
you being biased,
i let it go.
you assuming things and wronging me,
i let it go.
this time round,
i cant bring myself to do so.
it was too much.

you acted like you understand and know everything,
when you know nothing at all.
right from the very beginning,
you were already of wrong frequency.
but i kept quiet.
i dont wish to quarrel.
and i could not hold it in anymore.

its the first time im putting in 101% effort,
but you see it as being not disciplined.
i was really working hard studying till 6am,
but you claimed i was doing my own stuff.
after 18 years,
you still cannot tell what kind of a person i am?
thanks,
i guess my existence was a mistake right from the very start.
i will bare that in mind.

没想到，在你眼中，我一直以来就是那么的一个人。

im trying hard to concentrate.

the feel to play the piano is back!
like finally after so long.
but it came at a wrong time though.
hope the feel stays till i finish UTs.

meantime,
i need to get back to reality.
i need to concentrate on studying!
most probably studying overnight again.

bad friday.

entertained myself with videos.
made my day so much!
i completed 11 episodes in a day!
this is bad.
im supposed to be studying!
im going to study overnight again tomorrow,
i hope i can take it.

i feel very very burnt out after studying overnight for that 2 days.
now my body clock seemed slightly cocked up.
i feel so tired at night,
but i just cant get to sleep.

im keeping it to myself cus there's no one to share it with.

*sigh*

frustrated, grouchy, tired.
a good day turned bad.
the last thing i ever want is a flu the next day.

im freaking irritated with my laptop.
after the auto installation of the new anti virus thingy,
my laptop has been lagging like mad.
im thinking of uninstalling it.
after updating my msn,
i got hell load of pop ups.
will reformatting help?

please stop it.
there's a limit to everything.
stop acting like a kid.

SS501 - All My Love (Jap album)

加油！加油！

im feeling so worn out that i dont feel too good.
i cant fall sick at this point of time.
im going feed on pills and vitamins to stay healthy for now.

a rush of kan jiong-ness.
this is my very first time feeling that sleeping is a waste of time.
but i cant seem to survive without it that well.

SS501 is going to hold their concert in japan tomorrow!
s'pore better be in the list of the 10 countries they are heading to!
thank god they are busy with their persona tour at the moment,
if not i would not be able to concentrate on studying if they appear in programs.
but im kind of bored cus there nothing to watch online.

dont ask me questions that i have no answers to.

skipped workshop and went home to watch music bank!
first time i watched the whole thing without falling asleep.
i think im falling in love with Kpop man!
真材实料!
and most of them are quite young,
so BONUS!
Kpop is the ♥!

i have been complaining to mummy.
and she told me to leave band if i dont want to stay on anymore.
cool, extremely cool!
but there are many factors i need to consider.

FT Island - I Hope


Lyrics:
a day has passed, a month has passed
you still haven't contacted me
my tears are flowing, my heart aches
it won't be, this is only temporary
this can't be, this can't be
this can't be, don't comfort me
the space you left behind seems to be getting bigger

even i look again, you.. you are my love
even i look hundreds of times, i.. i am your love
a match made in heaven, you are my love
you just have lost you way
even if i was to born again, i hope..
even if i was to love again, i hope..
it will come back, it will come back
without you, i don't exist

you told me you love me
where did you go, leaving me here
two hands i held, our promises
you leave me, break me, what should i do
this is a dream, it is a dream
this is a dream, dont deceive me
it saddens me that i'm the only one left

even i look again, you.. you are my love
even i look hundreds of times, i.. i am your love
a match made in heaven, you are my love
you just have lost your way
even if i was to born again, i hope...
even if i was to love again, i hope...
it will come back, it will come back
without you, i don't exist

i though this was all a nightmare
ah~ please, let me wake up from this dream, i hope..
today will pass, when i open my eyes tomorrow
i hope this isn't my reality, i hope its just a dream, oh
everything, a more real than reality
i hope it was a dream, i want, you hope..
i still want you..

even i look again, you.. you are my love
even i look hundreds of times, i.. i am your love
a match made in heave, you are my love
we were only separated temporarily..
even there are other girls, i only hope..
even there are other love, i only hope..
it will come back, it will come back
without me, you don't exist...

let's go. i pray every night, not for your happiness, but for sadness
so that you won't love anyone besides me
there is only you for me, my heart tells you
i'll never change. even if i was to born again, i want...

even if i was to born again, i hope..
even if i love again, i only want..
it will come back, it will come back
without you, i don't exist

cus' i know your everything.

changed song! (:
the normal version.
the remix version is nice too!

i studied until 4am again.
but nothing much went into my head.
i was kind of distracted.

didnt study much today too.
disappointed.
but im no studying machine either.
cant i have a little break?

you wont know.
you wont understand.
until you are in their shoes.
i dont want to suffer from sleepless nights.
stop asking me that question.
it has no answer to it.

HAPPY 44TH BIRTHDAY, SINGAPORE!

blogger is finally back to normal!

i have tried it and wont do it again.
i slept at 6am!
its great studying at the wee hours cus many people would be asleep by then.
so hardly any msn-ing and video-ing.
it was just me and my notes!
2 hours of nap in the afternoon wasnt of much help.
its freaking tiring.

i missed my brother suddenly when i was watching NDP.
he actually paid $12 (australian dollar) to watch it at melbourne u over there.
daylight robbery man!

my mum is so troublesome.
she is making noise about cheese and us.
my bro eats cheese but not cheese cake.
i eat cheese cake but not cheese.
isnt it a good thing?
we wont fight.

an easily satisfied cactus.

my piano teacher was lecturing once again.
i was one of the victims.
she and her flower/plant theory.

please dont look at me that way.
you dont know me well enough,
you dont understand me enough to know my thoughts.
i wont turn over a new leaf for nothing.
it might seemed to be a miracle,
but im trying my best.

Kiss - Because I'm A Girl


Lyrics:
I just cant understand the hearts of men
They tell you they want you and then they leave you
This is the first time, you're special
I believed those words and I was so happy

You should have told me you didn't like me any more
But I couldn't see that and you just rushed me
Although I will curse you I'll still miss you
Because I am a girl, to whom love is everything

I heard that if you give up things too easily
To a man, he will get bored with you
I don't think this is wrong
A girl says that she will never be fooled again
But she will fall in love again

You should have told me you didn't like me any more
But I couldn't see that and you just rushed me
Although I will curse you I'll still miss you
Because I am a girl, to whom love is everything

[narration]
Hey babe
The pain
It's not enough to describe how i feel
We were so happy together
But I know now
I've been blind
You told me that you'd never let me down
Whenever I needed you you'd always be here
I can forgive but I cant forget
Even though you hurt me
I still love you
I still love you

Don't take advantage of a girl's willingness to do anything for love
And her caring instinct
U didn't know that to be born as a girl and to be loved was so hard
Although i will curse you i'll still miss you
Because I am a girl, to whom love is everything
Although i will curse you i'll still miss you
Because I am a girl, to whom love is everything

[the guy said]
There is a girl whom I love. Now I can`t stay with her, but I still love her.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, CHELSEA!

m.o.o.d.y

i was in the wrong today.
im sorry.
i thought you would understand,
but i guess i was wrong.
i apologize.
i wont make (empty) promises anymore.

you never fail to make my day, every single day!
thank you very much!
i love you!

and im addicted to this!
its really very nice!
still got subs! LOL.
enjoy!

Park Jung Min - Is it just me (aka Only Me)

HAPPY 22nd BIRTHDAY, BIG BROTHER!

i miss my big brother!
december, come quick!
so i can have both my brother and christmas!

i finally have the mood to study.
but it was ruined.
im being scolded for studying last minute.
wtf.
how last minute can it be when my exams are 2 weeks down the road?

swings.

i really got to get my priority right from no onwards.
im going to off my connection of internet whenever i study.
UT3 is next next week.
i got to chiong!

i feel so guilty!
firstly i lied to someone who i look upon to.
and i didnt turn up.
to make up for it,
i promised to go for both sessions next wednesday. (im so going to die)
secondly, i didnt study the whole day!
nothing at all!
my wednesday is just burnt like that.
crap.
so disappointed with myself.

im trying my best to control it,
but it somehow seemed worse than last time.
i wonder why...

i feel choked.

a listening ear,
a wary eye,
a careful mouth,
is all i need.

im not a fool.
why cant you just let me go?
i have already made up my mind,
so dont bother persuading me.
that talk will definitely be useless.
it will just be a waste of time,
that i assure.

im tired of putting up with it.
im tired of putting up a facade smile.
im tired of acting like someone else other than myself.

im feeling the stress.

UT3 schedule is out.
it means im kind of dead if im not going to start studying from now.

its so hot.
the weather is getting me.
i wasnt in a good thanks to the weather.
i apologise for that.

i just written my bro's birthday card.
it reminds me of cake.
and i feel like eating cheese cake.


SS501 is the love!
hope they hold their asia tour persona concert in sg!
by then, i need to find sponsors for the ticket.
any kind souls?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Kim Hyung Joon!

its killing me.

sleeping at 4am continuously for 2 nights is a killer!
im dead tired.
cus im hooked onto WGM once again.
argh!

i didnt know i was so influential.
i influenced a few people into liking SS501!
LOL.

and their asia tour concert seemed... FANTASTIC!
oh my god!
saw some clips and they are way too hot!
argh!
they better hold a concert in s'pore!
if i cant sleep tonight,
its all chelsea's fault!

wonderful night!

SS501's first aisa tour concert starts tonight!
its going to be held for 2 nights!
lets pray hard that they come to s'pore!

i was drained out.
i still could not get the album.
i was kind of disappointed.
i was kind of irritated before i met them.
BUT they made my day!
they entertained me!

flashbacks came flooding my mind upon seeing you.
i didnt know how to react,
i still couldnt talk to you.